Everyone is busy these days. The pursuit of "health, wealth, and happiness" is the goal, the dream we all aspire to. Yet, as we grow older, our bodies do not always keep up with the wishes of the mind.
If a health crisis (sudden stroke, broken hip, heart attack) or a slower progressing issue (age-related dementia, asthma, diabetes) causes a need for one to change how they live, what do you do?
Whether you are the affected senior, or the concerned family member, it is a difficult day when you realize a change in lifestyle, and possible living situation, must occur.
Those who have been independent their entire adult life may suddenly require around the clock supervision due to advancing memory problems. A broken bone may cause one to need help with activities of daily living, sometimes as simple as taking a bath, getting dressed, and using the bathroom.
Having been on the "inside", as a Certified Nursing Assistant and Licensed Practical Nurse in positions from direct care (bathing, dressing, feeding, toileting, ambulating), to staff nurse (giving medications, applying treatments, assessing changes in condition) to supervisor (direct contact with MD's, families, residents, emergency situations), I know what happens in nursing homes, assisted living situations, and home care.
If you or a loved one are faced with placement in a skilled nursing facility, use your five senses and your "sixth sense" to assess its quality.
Visual: Is the lobby appealing? Welcoming? When you tour the facility are staff smiling and visible? The amount of staff is important; ask about staff to resident care ratio; it will vary from shift to shift. Is trash visible? Are residents dressed appropriately? Are they lined up in wheelchairs being ignored while the staff congregates at the desk? Are the halls well lit, and free of small items if there were an emergency requiring evacuation?
Hearing: When you enter what do you hear first? Are you welcomed, acknowledged? Is there music playing, or a fun activity going on where you hear residents voices? Ask questions, many questions! As you walk through do not be afraid to ask a random staff member how they like working there. If you get a funny look or hesitancy, you may need to be wary. Listen for residents crying, moaning, "help", etc... This does happen but if it is ignored for long periods of time, or it is many people at once, there is a problem.
Smell: Do you smell anything when you enter? Is it a strong chemical, or perfumey smell? They may be trying to cover urine soaked carpet, or incontinent bins. If you smell urine, that could be bad indicator, as is moldy/old smells. Ask about ventilation, cleaning.
Taste: Ask for a sample of food from the kitchen! Chances are you and your loved one will be invited for a complimentary lunch; any reputable home will make accommodations allowing you to sample their cuisine. This is important! If you or your loved one will be on a special diet, ask for a sample of that kind of food.
Touch: The bedroom: Besides making sure the room you or a loved one will occupy is neat, tidy, and aesthetically appealing, ask to lay on the bed. Sit in the chairs in the foyer, the dining room. Check the height of the toilets, making sure they are high enough for those needing "high rise" seats".
And finally, your "sixth sense": If something feels off, not right, uncertain, then it most likely is. Yes, you are going to be scared and likely nervous about this most important decision. But when your gut tells you to "run", follow it. If the person giving you a tour is smiling and trying to rush you through certain areas, or avoids areas, ask why! If they can't answer, that could be a red flag! If you don't feel comfortable, do not be swayed! There are other options out there, regardless of income level.
The thought of losing independence is a hard pill to swallow for many. Senior care centers, elder homes, the dreaded "old folks home"... Many would rather not face this and instead allow the problem to progress to a point where more help is needed. If you catch the issues early, chances are, you can live a longer, more active, productive life!
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