The Growing Problem of Elder Abuse

Many uncompensated caregivers - spouses, adult children, relatives and friends - find caring for an elder to be satisfying and enriching. However, the responsibilities and demands of elder caregiving, can be extremely stressful. The stress of elder care can lead to mental and physical health problems that contribute to caregiver burn out. This stress often leads to unintentional as well as intentional elder abuse.

Even caregivers in institutional settings experience stress at levels that lead to elder abuse. Nursing homes may be susceptible to elder abuse issues if their employees do not receive adequate training, or have too many patients or responsibilities, and/or work under poor conditions.

The symptoms of caregiver stress include:

o Withdrawal
o Sleeplessness
o Sleeping difficulty
o Lack of concentration
o Weight loss/gain
o Drug/alcohol abuse
o Eating disorder
o Mood swings
o Chronic fatigue
o Feeling overwhelmed

Several of these symptoms can affect a person's ability to "think straight" or control their anger.

The different types of elder abuse

Abuse of the elderly takes many different forms, some involving physical or emotional intimidation, and neglect, sexual, financial and medical fraud. The following defines the different types of elder abuse.

Physical abuse

Physical elder abuse is non-accidental use of force against an elderly person that results in physical pain, injury, or impairment. Such abuse includes:

o Slapping, punching, hitting or pushing.
o Inappropriate use of drugs for the purpose of sedation
o Hand or ankle restraints
o Confinement to a room also constitutes physical abuse. This type of abuse most often occurs in an institutional setting.

Emotional abuse or intimidation

Emotional or psychological abuse and intimidation consists of:

o Verbal threats
o Withholding food or drink as a form of punishment
o Humiliation and ridicule
o Ignoring the elderly person
o Isolating an elder from friends or activities

Sexual abuse

Sexual elder abuse is contact with an elderly person without the elder's consent and consists of:

o Physical sexual contact with a person unable to consent
o Forcing older person to watch sex acts
o Forcing the elder to undress
o Forcing a person to look at pornographic material

Neglect or abandonment

Neglect or abandonment is describes as not fulfilling caretaker obligations whether a family member or professional caregiver. This category of abuse accounts for more than half of all reported cases of elder abuse in the US. It can be intentional or unintentional, based on factors such as ignorance or the denial that an older person needs as much care as he or she does.

Financial abuse

This can be the most difficult form of abuse to detect, as it involves the use of an elderly person's funds or property, by a caregiver, fraud artist or unscrupulous company. The following provides examples of financial abuse:

o Misuse of personal checks, credit cards, or financial accounts
o Stealing cash, income checks, or household goods
o Forging signature on legal and financial documents
o Identity theft
o Announcements of a "prize" that the elderly person has won but must pay money to claim
o Phony charities
o Investment fraud

Healthcare fraud and abuse

Carried out by unethical doctors, nurses, hospital personnel, and other professional care providers, examples of healthcare fraud and abuse regarding elders include:

o Not providing healthcare, but charging for it
o Overcharging or double-billing for medical care or services to Medicare or Medicaid
o Getting kickbacks for referrals to other providers or for prescribing certain drugs
o Stealing or selling personal information: social security number, credit card number or check routing number.

What can a caregiver do to prevent elder abuse?

Know what behaviors and situations trigger your emotional reactions. Its' not possible to be in control all of the time however by being aware of what "sets you off" you can plan for your response. There are also steps that are useful in understanding and dealing with your feelings.

Identify your feelings. Anxiety, anger, depression are qualitatively different and have different antecedents. Although it is unpleasant, admit and accept that you have a negative feeling.

Put distance between yourself and the situation. Go to the next room. Take a walk.

Take time to figure out what triggers your anger or negative feeling. What it is about a situation that makes you feel a certain way? How do you react? What does the situation mean to you?

Talk about your thoughts and feelings with someone who you trust, or write them down to express them. Sometimes writing helps one to understand, and begins the problem solving process. Talk to a professional if you are getting overwhelmed.

Make a plan. Figure out what you can do differently when you recognize that feeling again. Make the plan very concrete.

Remember there must be a balance between your needs and those of your loved one. Be comfortable with your limits. This means accepting what you are realistically able to do. Remember to be a good caregiver and to go beyond caregiving, your life must continue and be meaningful.

Ask for and be willing to accept help.

What can a long-term care facility do to prevent elder abuse?

Long term care facilities have a moral and legal obligation to make sure that their patients and residents are safe and well care for. They can help address the problem of elder abuse by:

o Increased staffing ratios - few patients per caregiver
o Employee caregiver support group
o Ongoing staff training and development programs
o Expanded training in dementia care
o Offer Employee Assistance Program
o Employee Appreciation events and awards

Professional caregivers are often reticent about asking for help, concerned that it might have a negative impact on job security. This is only one reason why employee support groups as well as EAP's are so important...offering a safe place for a caregiver to share their feelings. Also county funded elder abuse hot lines offer help for caregivers as well as the care recipient.

Please pick up the phone and call a hot line or support group if there is a possibility you might cross the thin line into elder abuse.

How to Use Wood Display Carts to Sell Your Merchandise

There's something appealing about old-fashioned display tools. Buckets, baskets, and wooden crates are popular ways to display certain items, and they bring with them the charm and serenity of a simpler time. Another display tool that can do this for you is a wood display cart. These old-fashioned carts evoke images of covered wagons, flower carts filled with violets, or sturdy crates sitting on docks, filled with exotic goods from around the world. It's worth it to give some thought to how to use wood display carts to sell your merchandise.

Flower Carts

Though you seldom see these charming wood carts being used to sell flowers, there are dozens of other things you can do with them. Set a few tureens on them and serve up coffee, hot chocolate, and baked goods at a cold weather sporting event. In warm weather, change it to iced tea and lemonade. Contract with a local team to sell penants, ball caps, and t-shirts-some of these carts even have wood slats you can hang things from. Make it a sign-up table for volunteers, or stack it with books and wheel it around an assisted living center or hospital. If you run a grocery store or restaurant, set your portable wood cart inside the door so that customers can get an advance taste of what awaits them inside.

Wagon Display Carts

A wooden wagon display cart evokes images of autumn, hayrides, and trips through the pumpkin patch. You can keep your wagon cart stationary and surround it with bales of hay to show off your pumpkins, squash, and other fall produce. You can also take it to all your local fall festivals and push it through the highest traffic areas. Your customers will love that they didn't have to come to you; you came to them!

Crate Display Cart

This kind of wood display cart looks like something that would have been rolled off a dock 150 years ago. It's rectangular and deep, and has three different compartments; you can almost see the stevedores prying the wooden lid off with a crowbar to display the shipment inside. For display purposed, it's adjustable, so it can rest flat like a trunk, vertical like a shelf, or at a slant, to offer different levels for your displays. It rests on a wooden frame that's on casters, so it can be easily rolled to whatever location you can use it best. This is another one that can benefit from seasonal displays, using hay, pumpkins, Christmas wrappings, or a fulsome display of spring or autumn plants and flowers. You can also consider displaying clothing, bolts of cloth, or handmade quilts, which can easily be folded or draped over the wood cart's edges.

Wood display carts are so versatile and charming that people are drawn to them without even being aware of it. Now that you have some ideas on how to use wood display carts to sell your merchandise, use them to display your seasonal merchandise, or just those things that need to be portable and easy to move. You'll never regret investing in a wood display cart for your business.

Winter Is a Popular Season for Slip and Fall Lawyers

Ice, snow and sleet are recipes for disaster when it comes to safety during winter months, and staying on two feet can be a challenge for people of any age when these conditions are present. This is why it's important to understand slip and fall lawsuits, and how serious these accidents can be.

Slipping and falling, especially in icy conditions, can cause severe injury and sometimes even death. In 2009, 212,760 work-related injury cases involved falls, according to the Bureau of Labor and Statistics. In addition, in 2006 there were 52 fatal injuries from a fall due to a floor, walkway or surface.

Those numbers don't even include the falls that happened outside of the workplace. In some instances people will slip and fall on someone else's property, or at a business. Regardless, people who have suffered significant injuries from slipping and falling could potentially be compensated, depending on the following circumstances:

Circumstances that warrant a lawsuit:

• The owner of the property or business has caused the spill, or was responsible for creating the slippery or dangerous surface that created the fall. For example throwing water out on the sidewalk on a cold day, letting a hose or water run on a driveway during winter etc.
• The owner knew about the dangerous surface, such as ice on the steps or snow piled in front of the door, and did nothing about it, when he or she realized that it was dangerous.
• The owner of the property or business should have known about the problem, and it can be proven that another "reasonable" person would have discovered it and repaired it or fixed it.

Circumstances that do NOT warrant a lawsuit:

• The conditions, or surface, where the fall took place were naturally occurring conditions. This would include a natural slop to the surface of the ground, a drainage grate or a manhole
• The natural conditions were those in which the property or business owner could not possibly have prevented or kept under control at all times. This would include a sidewalk during a rainstorm or snow showers.
• The fall was due to the pedestrian not paying attention or being distracted.

There can be a fine line as to whether the circumstances that caused a slip and fall accident warrant a lawsuit, therefore, someone looking to file a lawsuit based on a slip and fall accident should seek the help of an attorney.

A personal injury attorney or slip and fall lawyer would be able to handle this type of lawsuit and help the victim decide if another person is to blame for their fall and injuries. Personal injury attorneys are familiar with their state's procedures and are also familiar with workplace laws and the types of insurance workplaces already provide for slip and fall accidents.

Although slip and fall lawyers can help provide compensation for an accident that was the fault of another, the best way to handle slip and fall lawsuits is to avoid them, especially during the winter. Property owners should maintain the safety of their property during the winter; shovel snow off of stairs, walkways and driveways and make it a habit to check the property for potential hazards. Pedestrians should be mindful of weather conditions and pay attention to where they are walking, limiting distractions in hazardous conditions.

Accidents at Hotels

For many, hotels function as a "home away from home", providing the comfort one is used to from their own house. On a business trip or a fun vacation, hotels provide a warm bed, a hot shower and home-cooked meal for patrons. However, similar to other premises such as restaurants or supermarkets, hotels are responsible for keeping a well-maintained facility, free of hazards that may injure their guests. Management, staff and maintenance teams must keep the hotel is optimal condition, or be subject to premises liability claims. If a patron is injured due to the negligent upkeep of the facility, or some other hazard that should have been addressed, that patron may be able to sue in a court of law.

Injuries and accidents that happen at a hotel can have devastating consequences. Not only are you far away from your comfort zone (and your hometown), you also may be all by yourself with no one around to help you recover. This is the precise reason that premises liability covers not only physical suffering, but emotional suffering as well. In order to make sure you receive the financial compensation that is entitled to you in a court of law, you will want to hire an experience attorney to help present your case.

The following events could take place at a hotel:

繚 Slip and fall accident
繚 Burn injuries from fire hazards or improperly maintained electronics
繚 Harm from defective beds, chairs or couches
繚 Food borne illness from food prepared by hotel kitchen
繚 Safety concerns due to lack of security
繚 Theft by hotel employees
繚 Abuse by staff members
繚 Injuries resulting from inadequate staff training
繚 Lack or malfunction of safety equipment
繚 Lack of visibility or lighting
繚 Swimming pool injuries

Proving negligence can often be difficult in premises liability claims. For this reason, it is imperative to consult with an expert attorney immediately following your incident. If you or someone you love has been hurt by the reckless or negligent behavior of hotel staff member, you have legal rights under the law to help you recover from resulting damages. It is entirely unacceptable to allow these facilities to operate in an unsafe manner and your case can help shed light on this problem.

When Someone Dies in an Accident, Can I Claim Compensation?

The death of a loved one is an upsetting and stressful time in any circumstance, but when the death was due to the fault or negligence of a third party the effects are even more devastating. If a family member has died in a car accident, an accident at work or due to medical negligence, you may be entitled to make a claim. Whilst no amount of money can ever truly compensate for the death of a loved one, it may go some way to easing financial worries.

Who can claim compensation following a loved one's death?

Claim by the Executor

The law in England and Wales regarding who is entitled to claim compensation following a death is contained in the Law Reform (Miscellaneous Provisions) Act 1934 and Fatal Accidents Act 1976. These acts state that it is the deceased's estate which is entitled to claim and is usually brought by the Executor on behalf of all dependants, but if no claim is brought within 6 months from the date of death, then a claim can be brought by any dependent of the deceased. Any compensation received by the estate is distributed in accordance with the Will or, if no Will was left, under the intestacy rules.

What compensation can the Executor claim?

•General damages - this compensates for the pain suffering and loss of amenity suffered by the deceased before their death.
•Medical expenses - if the deceased incurred any medical fees for private medical treatment prior to their death the cost of these will be recoverable. Receipts or invoices will be needed to evidence the cost.
•Travel expenses - family and friends who have been visiting the deceased at hospital or at home, over and above the amount they would have visited in normal circumstances, then they are entitled to claim reimbursements of their travel costs. Remember to keep taxi receipts and parking tickets.
•Past losses up to date of death - this will include any loss of earnings if the deceased was unable to work.
•Care and assistance - if help was provided in looking after a friend or loved one whilst they were at home or in hospital, such as helping them wash, assisting with meals, then the cost of the care can be claimed for. Even if no payment was made and the care was gratuitous, a claim can still be made.
•Funeral expenses - the reasonable funeral costs can be recovered if receipts are kept.
•Probate fees - if probate or other legal fees were incurred these are usually recoverable.

Claim by a Family Member or Dependant

What compensation can Relatives and Dependants Claim?

The law states certain relatives to the deceased are entitled to claim a bereavement award. The bereavement award can be claimed by the:

•wife, husband or civil partner of deceased
•where deceased is a minor, his parents where legitimate or mother where illegitimate
•children under 18 years on the death of their parent
•cohabitants of 2 years duration
•unmarried fathers with parental responsibility

Unfortunately the bereavement award is not available to former spouse, children over 18 years of age or step-children. However, there is an argument this may be in breach of rights under Human Rights legislation and you should speak to your lawyer regarding an entitlement to bereavement awarded in other circumstances.

The amount of the bereavement award is fixed by law. Many feel the level of the bereavement award is very low, but unfortunately the amount is fixed and is not a head of claim that is open to negotiation.

How much is the Bereavement Award for a Fatal Accident?

For deaths after 1 January 2008 the bereavement award is 瞿11,800.

Financial and other support provided by the Deceased

For the purposes of a compensation claim, only people who fall within the legal definition of a dependent are entitled to claim compensation. A dependent is defined as the:

•spouse, civil partner, former spouse/ civil partner of the deceased
•cohabitants living as with the deceased as man and wife for at least 2 years prior to death
•parents of the deceased
•any person who the deceased treated as a parent
•any child or descendant of the deceased
•any person who although not the deceased's own child, by reason of marriage or civil partnership was treated by the deceased as a child of the family
•the brother, sister, uncle or aunt of the deceased.

If it can be established that someone is a dependent of the deceased they are entitled to claim compensation for:

Loss of earnings or Pension

Where the deceased was earning an income or private or state pension, from which the dependent benefited, claim can be made by the dependent for the financial loss. This would cover situations where the deceased was responsible for paying the mortgage or other utility bills. Wage slips and information from the department of work and pension will be needed to support the claim. The loss can be calculated up until the dependency would no longer exist. In the case of a spouse this would normally be until the deceased would have retired in the case of loss of earnings. In the case of a child this will normally be until they are 18 years or otherwise financially independent of the deceased.

Dependency of gifts, holidays, luxuries

Courts require clear evidence of proof of gifts and luxuries prior to death. Future levels of dependency will then be assessed by the past evidence.

Loss of services provided by the deceased

Where deceased provided services such as childcare, cooking, cleaning can claim for lost services.

Specialist Lawyers

Claiming compensation when a loved one has died due to an accident or negligence is an upsetting and stressful procedure. It is important that you choose specialist lawyers assist you with the legal process and make sure maximum compensation is recovered to ease the financial burden.

Why Me? I Didn't Ask For This: The Sandwich Generation, Part II

The harsh, cold winters are terrible for the elderly. Many attribute their painful physical conditions to that. There is also the risk of falling on the ice and in snow. The fact is, arthritis not only affects elderly people, but it can affect anyone at any age. However, since seniors believe that arthritis is handled better in warmer climates, many move away from their children to live in Florida where the heat is soothing. However, there are days when Florida's hot and humid weather can also cause pain. Another option that seniors have looked to is the desert climate of Arizona, which is quite advantageous for people with arthritis. Nonetheless, wherever they decide to go, the decision to leave will not diminish the fears or anxieties that their child may have in regards to their parent's well-being, especially when they are an only child. There is always the concern that something can happen that might uproot everyone's lives.

For example, you may have a situation like this:

The telephone rings. You answer. It's the emergency room at the hospital. It's the call you were dreading. The nurse speaks with a concerned voice, "Mrs. J., your mom was crossing the street on foot and was hit by a car. I want to let you know the nature of her injuries. She has internal bleeding; broken vertebrae in her back, a shattered pelvis and her arm and leg are broken as well. It's a wonder she survived. She is in a terrible amount of pain. Your father is very anxious and doesn't make sense when he talks. I think he is in shock. The doctor is examining him now. Can you please come soon? It is extremely urgent. Your mother is asking for you. The seriousness of her injuries requires immediate surgery. Your mother has agreed to it if it would stop the horrendous pain. Even with the surgery, the doctor is not sure if she will ever walk again. I am letting you know that she will have to stay here after her surgery until she is moved into a rehabilitation center."

You sit stunned by the complicating issues in this sudden, unanticipated mess, trying to figure out how best to break the news to your husband and children. How will they react when they find out you have to leave immediately? Who will take care of the kids when you're gone, perhaps a week or more? Taking mental notes, you wonder about the power of attorney and the living will that wasn't made at the time your parents moved, as they were both in full capacity and robust at the time so dad didn't think it was necessary. However, recently, dad has had some health issues with his heart which are causing you great concern. You are worried that dad might have a heart attack with all this stress. You say to yourself, 'I hope there is a will, because this can complicate matters. I don't even know if they both have life insurance and if so, how much? I'll have to take care of that later when I arrive in Florida, as one of my "Must Do's." You suddenly remembered what the nurse said, that your mom was going to be moved to a nursing home or a rehabilitation center after she leaves the hospital, if she leaves the hospital.

Now you are apprehensive, after considering the big "What If," what if they don't have long-term care insurance? My God, between the nursing-home residency, of which Medicare only covers a small portion, and the cost of long-term care, a mind-boggling figure of anywhere between $50,000 to a $100,000 a year may result.. Who is going to pay for that? "I can't think about that now," you say to yourself. "All of this is making me nervous." As you rush and make calls the wheels of your mind are still in motion pondering on the "What Ifs." You are starting to feel queasy and angry at the same time. You stop for a moment and say, "they'll have to sell their home and perhaps move into an assisted living facility which will be costly as well. Come to think of it, the worst could happen, they might just end up moving into my home. If mom can't walk, who will take care of her? Dad can't. Will I have to give up my job? Oh no, this can't be happening. WHY ME, I DIDN'T ASK FOR THIS! I don't mind dad living with us. He is such a sweetheart, but what about mom? It would be sheer hell. We never got along. To make matters worse, Jimmie dislikes my mom and the feeling is mutual. I am almost sure that my home will end up being a battle zone. I don't know what to do, why did she have only one child?" Your hands are shaking. "I hope my mother-in-law will watch the kids while I'm gone. What will Jimmy say? Now this will give him a good reason to leave.

Relieved that you were able to get a flight for that evening, you begin to pack. You inform your employer that you had a serious family emergency and need to leave immediately. You ask him if you could use your vacation time for this. His approval comes as a big relief.

Between the cost of airline tickets and other additional expenses added to the credit card, a hefty bill is tallied, adding more debt to your finances. Plus you lose your vacation time, time that was intended to be used at a later date. Whatever the results, the reality of the situation at hand is adding weight to your already hectic schedule. By now you know what's in store for you; the cost of flying back and forth between New York and Florida will become exorbitant. On the other hand, you could move to where they live, but that would wreak havoc for all back home. Lastly as a dreaded alternative, you could have your parents move into your home. This way you would be able to keep an eye on them even though this arrangement will also wreak havoc for all concerned. You find yourself trapped by making the choice between: "what you would rather do" and "what is required for you to do." You have officially joined the privileged ranks of the "Sandwich Generation," sandwiched between responsibility for those that raised you and choices that define your own life.

Whether the aging parent becomes confined to a nursing home, a rehabilitation center or an assisted living facility, the demands on the Sandwich Generation still exist. These caregiver's nerves are strained to the utmost. They suffer from depression, anxiety and even some may develop heart problems from all the stress. As it is, the wife-mother-daughter generally is a multi-tasked person holding down multiple jobs and responsibilities all at once.

Now let's take a look at another example. Mrs. B. is a sixty year old stay-at-home grandmother who never had to work because her husband always made decent money. Both of her children have married and maintain successful careers. Her daughter, Sue, finally was able to have two children after several unsuccessful attempts. With so much spare time on her hands, Mrs. B. can do all the things she wants to. Travel, play Mahjong with friends every other week, go to Broadway shows and participate in community activities. Since Mrs. B is a stay-at-home wife, she comes to be the lucky candidate who assumes the babysitter role at a moment's notice for her daughter. How can she refuse to take care of her sweet, innocent darlings once in a while? Happy and doing well, she feels her life is blessed. However, add to this context an aging mom with advanced dementia, the situation changes and becomes overwhelming, piling on additional responsibilities. Now Mrs. B's daughter has just received a promotion and has to put in more hours at her job. Sue is so excited, since it will raise her salary $30,000 a year. She's hoping that mom can take care of the kids full-time.

"Don't get nervous, it's only temporary until I get the hang of it, then I will put them in daycare," she says. At age sixty, Mrs. B. is not looking forward to spending 40 + hours a week taking care of a baby and a two-year-old toddler. She also has the responsibility of an aging mom with dementia. Since her father passed away over three years ago, Mrs. B. has been noticing changes in her mother's personality. Apparently she has been suffering from clinical depression with mood swings, wherein she would become enraged, unresponsive or withdrawn. She also watched her mom slowly fade into the never-ending fog of memory loss, repeating herself over and over again. Mrs. B.'s mom would become increasingly bewildered and confused, even in familiar surroundings. Lately, her appetite has been poor, and to make matters worse, she has developed a foul odor. She has been neglecting her personal hygiene as she does not realize that she has to bathe and change her clothes. Since Mrs. B. is the oldest of three sisters and as she lives the closest to mom, and supposedly had more free time on her hands than the others, she has become the designated primary caregiver, against her wishes. So as a result, Mrs. B.'s mom moves in with her daughter. Both situations have disrupted Mrs. B.'s comfort zone. It also has interfered with the quiet life that she built with her husband since the kids got married and moved out of the house.

The full-time baby-sitting issue in regards to her grandchildren is becoming a serious problem for her, going on for several months now. She cannot understand why it's taking her daughter so long to put them in daycare. Mrs. B. is too tired. She is wound tighter than a rubber band. The baby is teething and crying constantly and the toddler still in diapers is hungry, tugging at her pants. Suddenly the door bell rings. It's her next door neighbor asking if she could pick up her mail for the next four days since she won't be home. Smiling, Mrs. B. agrees and closes the door. She starts to fume, feeling envious of her neighbor, who has the freedom to take off when she wants to while Mrs. B. is trapped at home with two grandchildren, constantly changing diapers and doing the laundry.

She says, "What does she think I am, her errand girl? With all that I am doing, she has the nerve to ask!" Not even the girls at Mahjong call her anymore. They have been avoiding her like the plague. She calls her daughter constantly, complaining about the kids and her mom. The daughter, avoiding the issue, puts her on voice mail. Mrs. B. screams at her mom. She calls her sisters and vents on them for not helping out. She vents to the mailman, the supermarket cashier, whoever might lend an ear. She can't wait to vent on her husband when he comes home. There is no way for him to avoid the sound of her shrilly voice, her expression revealing her anger. He is deeply concerned that she may be having a nervous breakdown. The peaceful life of Mr. and Mrs. B. is long gone.

Meanwhile, Mrs. B. can hear her aging mom fussing because she has a terrible case of the runs, soiling her underwear and nightgown, she needs to be washed and changed just like the grandchildren she routinely babysits. Mrs. B. has found herself in a situation that is not easily solvable. She starts to freak out. She is extremely tired and cranky. She needs sleep in a desperate way. The horrible consciousness and sandwiched existence cause tears to stream from her eyes. "I can't stand it anymore. I hate what I'm doing. I don't want to do this any longer. I want it to go away," she cries. "I am only one person, how can I separate myself into so many pieces and satisfy everyone at the same time? Doesn't anyone care about me? I have needs too." She sits there stressed out, her body wracking with heart wrenching sobs. Frightened by grandma's emotional state, the baby starts to cry and her whole face turns red while the toddler starts to cry as well. Finally, she screams at the top of her lungs and says, "WHY ME? I DIDN'T ASK FOR THIS!"

Do these examples sound familiar? If so, you are not alone. Caring for aging parents is not an easy task. It saps your energy and robs you of your peace of mind. Very few people are emotionally ready to undertake this role. The comfort zone which you have created for yourself, including the freedom to come and go as you please, career fulfillment, and an active social life with your friends becomes completely disrupted. With care-giving, you feel captive to the needs of whoever you are caring for. Also, it puts you in the awkward position of parenting your own parents.

In the final part of this 3 part series, I'll address ways I have had to deal with being a member of the Sandwich Generation, and ways to help cope with the stress involved with being a caregiver.

America's Top 200 Attributes

Technology and Industrialism

1. A phone system that works virtually all of the time
2. Electricity and running water
3. Toilets and toilet paper
4. Easy access to the Internet
5. Email
6. Instant messaging
7. Skype and video chat services for long-distance communication
8. Social networking sites
9. Cell phones and text messaging
10. Shops with free Wi-Fi
11. Digital cameras
12. Central heating and cooling
13. ATMs
14. Washing machines and dryers
15. Food blenders
16. Microwaves
17. Target and Wal-Mart
18. Coffeemakers
19. TiVo and DVR
20. Ability to pay bills online
21. Google
22. YouTube
23. Digital cameras

Capitalism (In flux)

24. The stability of currency
25. The entrepreneurial spirit
26. The stock market, yes, even now
27. Self-employment opportunities galore
28. A diverse job market
29. Mail and delivery services
30. Free interstate commerce

Transportation

31. Airports that are usually well-functioning
32. The interstate highway system
33. Highway rest areas
34. Low gasoline prices (compared to Europe)
35. Public transportation
36. U.S. passports
37. Car and truck dealerships
38. Taxis

Health and Diet

39. The variety of foods available
40. Availability of locally grown produce
41. Foods from all around the world
42. Farmers' Markets
43. Health clubs, gyms, and exercise equipment
44. The vitamin industry
45. WebMD (www.WebMD.com)
46. Organic supermarkets
47. Increasing crop yields
48. Cookbooks
49. DVDs and TV channels dedicated to health, diet, and exercise
50. Availability of flu shots
51. Standards for immunizations
52. Dental and orthodontic care
53. Variety of specialized care available
54. Nursing homes and assisted living facilities

Freedom and Equality

55. The Constitution and its amendments
56. The peaceful transference of power
57. Religious freedom
58. The right to peaceful assembly
59. Freedom of expression
60. Traditional presidential pardons
61. Freedom of speech
62. Freedom of the press
63. Democracy and the right to vote
64. Accessible polls for voting
65. Diversity
66. Social mobility

Access to Information and Education

67. Elementary, middle, and high schools
68. The variety of DVDs, CDs, digital programs, and books available
69. CSPAN
70. Debates on live television
71. Public libraries
72. Business, law, and medical schools, etc.
73. Endowments and scholarship programs
74. Major daily newspapers
75. Live television news
76. Instantly up-to-date online news
77. How-to and do-it-yourself blogs and websites
78. Wikipedia
79. Dictionaries, encyclopedias, and reference books on all topics
80. The community college system
81. Online higher education programs
82. A&E, TLC, and History Channel productions
83. PTA
84. Public museums
85. Standards for literacy

Charity

86. The Red Cross
87. Telethons
88. Per capita contributions to charity organizations
89. The United Way
90. Relief organizations
91. Civic participation and volunteerism
92. Homeless shelters
93. Big brother/big sister programs
94. Goodwill, thrift stores, and consignment shops
95. Senior discounts
96. Foster homes
97. Adoption agencies
98. Meals on Wheels
99. Foundations for cancer research
100. National months of awareness for a variety of issues
101. YMCA and YWCA
102. Salvation Army

Safety and Protection

103. Emergency operating rooms
104. Clean water
105. Air that's safe to breathe
106. Maternity wards
107. Emergency response systems
108. Ambulances and emergency rooms
109. Free clinics
110. Urgent care centers
111. The U.S. Department of Defense
112. Clean, safe streets and highways
113. Traffic lights, well-marked road signs and lanes
114. Copyright laws
115. Restaurant and food sanitation standards
116. The FDA
117. Free public restrooms
118. The watchdog aspect of the press
119. The system of juris prudence (usually)
120. Daycare centers
121. Seatbelts and airbags
122. The Armed Forces
123. The police force
124. The fire department
125. Neighborhood watch programs
126. Adopt-a-street and adopt-a-waterway programs
127. Pets on leashes (usually)
128. Trash and recycling pick-up

Traditions and Ceremonies

129. Cookouts and barbecues
130. Graduation ceremonies
131. Family farms
132. Family reunions
133. Baby and wedding showers
134. Easter egg hunts
135. Trick or treat-ing
136. Exchanging Christmas gifts
137. Memorial Day, Labor Day
138. Thanksgiving
139. 4th of July celebrations and fireworks
140. The Times Square New Year's Eve celebration and ball drop

Entertainment

141. Theme parks
142. State fairs
143. Rock and roll music
144. Country music
145. Disney World, Disney Land
146. Universal Studios
147. Sea World
148. Variety in music
149. Magazines for every interest
150. Mp3 players
151. Little Leagues
152. Talk Radio
153. Award shows
154. Major League Baseball
155. National Football League
156. National Hockey League
157. Major League Soccer
158. Professional golf, tennis, and other sports
159. College sports
160. Comedians
161. Public recreation facilities
162. Hiking, walking, and biking trails
163. Zoos
164. Aviaries
165. Aquariums
166. Sport camps
167. Podcasts and webcasts
168. Venues for music and the dramatic arts
169. Cultural festivals
170. Arts festivals, music festivals
171. Ski resorts

Sites and Attractions

172. The national park system
173. The reclamation of lakes and waterways
174. Safe campgrounds
175. The beaches
176. The mountain ranges
177. Varied geography, even within states
178. Variety of sizes of towns and cities
179. The Grand Canyon
180. Mt. Rushmore
181. Nashville, Tennessee
182. Chicago
183. Hawaii
184. Golden Gate Bridge, San Francisco
185. Niagra Falls, New York

Organizations and Institutions

186. The American Dental Association
187. Senior communities
188. Scouting organizations
189. Colleges and universities
190. American Association of Retired Persons
191. National Association for the Advancement of Colored People
192. American Medical Association
193. American Bar Association

Historical Landmarks

194. Washington, D.C.
195. Jamestown
196. Alaska
197. New York City
198. Boston
199. College towns
200. Gettysburg